Many years ago, I earned a living as a bartender and
I’ve learned a lot about life from this profession. After settling into the position, you either become a drunk or a
teetotaler—there’s really no middle ground.
There is a great amount of responsibility to serving drinks, and I’m not
talking about knowing what is in a rum and coke. You see the same faces night after night, hear their stories, and
ponder why you are in this position. I’ve been their friend, counselor and even
parent from time to time. I eventually
drank myself out of the position, though I never considered myself a
drunk. I was just curious about all of
the bottles that sat behind me at the bar.
It took me three months to sample all of them. Now, many years later, I know my limits and only drink alcohol to
celebrate a situation, not run from one, which brings me to the point of this
list. I am an intellectual drunk and
tend to disappear when my mind, and floor, starts spinning. I like the happy drunks, but I usually
served the angry ones. For whatever
reason, they always seemed to sit at my station and more times than not the
police became involved. Not that these
songs are bad, but they tend to be the ones on the Jukebox when a fight breaks
out, which is entertaining, but hard on the furnishings. Each generation has their list of drinking
songs that sometimes leads to violence.
I like these songs, they bring merriment to a situation, but sometimes I
think some people get the wrong idea.
Violence isn’t created by one event or song in one’s life. It is a process that develops out of your
own experience and listening to these selections won’t change you. I think that too many people use the excuse
of music to justify their bad behavior, but I don’t buy it. I enjoy these songs when I’m sloshed or
sober. This list is dedicated to my
“lovey” friend upon her 21st birthday. I think she has the right attitude about the demon alcohol and
will probably have a good relationship with the spirits. May your hangovers be few and your drinks be
free.
Playlist for Demon AlcoholSongs
1. Metallica – “Whiskey In The Jar”(1998)
This cover was recorded between the albums “Reload”
and “St. Anger” and is a popular traditional Irish song that has been
recorded by a slew of artists, most notably by Thin Lizzy in 1972. With each generation, this song crops up and
the band of the moment records it. I
really like this version because I’ve seen some of the best bar fights in an
Irish pub when this song is played.
2. Nashville Pussy – “Hate and Whiskey”(2000)
This song is taken from the album “High as Hell,”
and really fits my current situation.
Living in a small town, and earning a measly wage, there really isn’t
enough left over to actually try to better yourself. At the end of the pay period the bars become filled with angry
young men that eventually become angry old men. The ‘don’t fuck with me’ mentality is really prevalent, but if you
just take the time to get to know someone, you might just end up as drinkin’
buddies and not barroom brawlers.
3. Black Label Society – “Stoned And Drunk”(2003)
“The Blessed Hellride,” is one of the best
beer drinkin’ albums—period. The code
of the BLS is Strength, Determination, Merciless,
and Forever. And Zakk Wylde (occasional
guitarist for Ozzy) subscribes to the philosophy of ‘fear no
beer,’ which I think is a lot better than fearing what might be going down in
the parking lot after those who do not obey the code.
4. Rob Zombie – “Pussy Liquor”(2003)
This is taken from the albums, “House of 1000
Corpses” and his first greatest hits, “Past, Present & Future.” The voice over in this track
is Sherri Moon Zombie, and though she is a sinisterly sensual gal, she has the
ability to go from 0 to crazy in .08 seconds, which is over the legal limit for
alcohol in Indiana.
5. Buckcherry – “Too Drunk...”(2008)
I’d like to think that this song was inspired by the
Dead Kennedy’s song, “Too Drunk to Fuck,” but I’m sure there was
some homage to this punk rock classic.
Taken from the “Black Butterfly” album, this song was replaced
with a cover of "Highway Star" in the re-released
version/"clean" version. I
think that both songs need to be in this record. It’s one of those lifestyle party songs that for those in the know,
nod their heads in agreement.
6. GODSMACK – “Whiskey Hangover”(2009)
Now this is dedication. Taken off of the album “The Oracle,” this is a real life
conversation that I’ve had with many an angry drunk. It brings back good memories though, but not in the way you would
think. It’s a hard-nosed approach to
dealing with other people’s shit.
Sometimes I wish I could just tell the annoying people in my life to
just fuck off, but then I would be in more bar fights than I would
like.
7. Genitotortures – “Devil In a Bottle”(2009)
I am in Love with this woman, but it would be a
short-lived affair. Nevertheless, this
song is taken off of the album “Blackheart Revolution,” where Gen delves
into the consequences of being a Joan of Arc leader of the freaks. This whole record rocks, so check it
out.
Interview with Genof the Genitortures.
Bonus Videos:
Old school alcoholism of the
eighties.
Ozzy Osborune – “Suicide Solution”(1980)
The first solo effort, “Blizzard of Oz,” from
the Oz man himself. This song caused so
much controversy, but it’s really a wakeup call for those who drink to
excess. It’s just a slower version of
putting a gun to your head.
ACDC – “Have a Drink on Me” (1980)
There really isn’t a filler track on their seminal
release, “Back In Black.” Yes,
this is the mythical album after Bon Scott (original vocalist) died by
choking on his own vomit due to alcohol consumption. The whole album deals with
the consequences of the rock star lifestyle and should be mandatory listening
for all, and there are great songs on it as well.
Def Leppard – “Me and My Wine”(1981)
This is one of the singles of the album, “High
‘n’ Dry,” and showcases how the band gets thier party on, and yet, years
later, they went though a myriad of difficulties including the death of
guitarist Stephen Maynard Clark (Codeine/Alchol Overdose) and Rick
Allen (Drums) loosing his arm due to an automobile
accident.
Bonus Bonus Video:
Rehab – “Bartender (Sittin' At A Bar)”(2008)
I have heard this story a million
times.
