Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing. Sometimes I feel more at ease staying in a
difficult situation than take the risk of attempting something greater. If I know what the problems are in a current
situation, then the familiar remedies are close at hand. When those moments of difficulty outweigh
leaping into the unknown then that is when real change has to happen. Sometimes you can’t help the person that you
love, because they don’t want the help—they have to want to become better. Some may think that this is abandonment, and
that you have to have loyalty to the ones you love, but you serve them no
purpose if you crash and burn with them.
As of this week, I’m starting a new chapter in my life. I am embarking upon a new path, and am
unsure of where it will take me. I have
to believe in the wisdom of those who have traveled this road, because the path
is marked with their successes. There
are a lot of relationships that I’m leaving behind, but I hope to find that
several people will be joining me in their pursuits of something great. There is always room to have travel
companions in this life. I’ve compiled
a list of songs that deal with leaving relationships behind. I’m not advocating bailing at the first
sight of trouble, but you have to know when to stay and when to leave. Some of these songs have a bit of regret in
their lyrics, but I believe there is wisdom in these songs. Reminiscing about things that you could have
done, or should have noticed, is a learning experience and is meant to provide
comfort to those who are going though the same thing. Don’t live your life with regret.
Playlist for LeavingRelationships Behind
1. Paul Simon – “Train In The Distance”(1983)
This song, taken from his sixth studio album, “Hearts
And Bones” provides a glimmer of hope in a difficult relationship. I don’t think that the couple in this song
ever gets back together, but they remain in contact. It’s so easy for true believers in love to be tripped up in what
their hearts and heads are telling them about the relationship. This record was intended to be a reunion for
Simon & Garfunkel, but due to artistic differences it was reworked as a
solo record for Paul. This album, at
the time, was considered one of the low points in Paul’s career, but with the
passing of time it has become one of his most important
records.
2. SheDaisy-“Little Good-Byes”(1999)
This is the first single off of the group’s debut
release, “The Whole SHeBANG.” I
love the playful nature of the lyrics as the women in the song leaves behind
little reminders to the man that the relationship is over. Though the record is not a concept album, it
does have running theme of how a women define themselves in a
relationships. The vocal harmonies on
this record are top-notch and transcend the borders of the country charts by
appearing pop music ones as well.
3. Jimmy Wayne – “Stay Gone”(2003)
This is the lead single off of Jimmy’s self-titled
debut release. It was also re-released
on his second album “Do You Believe Me Now,”(2008) to give potential
fans a second chance to be properly introduced to this multi-faceted
artist. In this song, the narrator is
telling an ex-lover, though you could apply this theme to many relationships,
to ‘stay gone’ because they have found peace in their absence, and would like
to keep it that way. Sometimes a person
can be so toxic to you that no amount of antidote can save you. You may still love these people, and they
may not be bad for others, but you have to learn to take care of yourself. With Jimmy, he was fortunate to have been
taken in by a very caring Christian couple that saved him from being another
casualty of the foster care system. On
January 1, 2010, Jimmy set out on a 1,660 mile solo-hike from Nashville, Tennessee
to Phoenix, Arizona to raise awareness about homeless youth and more
specifically children aging out of the foster system. Called the "Meet
Me Halfway" campaign, he walked 25 miles a day, only coming off the
walk for scheduled concerts and to go to the California State Capitol to speak
in favor of a bill that would increase the age kids age of the foster system
from 18 to 21. Jimmy is now busier than
ever, as he continues to be an advocate for homeless youth in the midst of
writing a book and recording new music.
Previous Artist Feature: JimmyWayne
CD Reviews: SaraSmile (2010) & DoYou Believe Me Now? (2008)
4. Keith Urban-“You’ll Think of Me”(2004)
This is the fourth single from his album “Golden
Road,” which earned Keith his first Grammy, but he was earning many awards
back in Australia before this song.
Keith took a chance and moved to Nashville, because he wanted to move
beyond hometown accolades and into the mainstream. The transition was not easy and was plagued with several
stumbling blocks, one of which was checking into rehab right before he was
about attain his goal of becoming a country superstar. The fans waited, and with the support of his
wife Nicole Kidman, he was able achieve great success with his
career. Ironically, the theme of this
song doesn’t have a happy ending, well…at least for one of the
individuals. This is an all too
familiar story, but one that has a punch line.
Sure, you can leave this relationship, but in the process I will become
a whole lot better, and all you will have of me is just
memories.
5. Sheryl Crow – “Good Is Good”(2005)
This is the first single from her album, “Wildflower,”
and though it didn’t garner much attention on the pop charts, I think it’s one
of her most profound songs. Sometimes
we can be a little gun-shy about a relationship—we all have baggage, but there
comes a time when you have to make some sort of movement forward. “And every time you hear the rolling
thunder, you turn around before the lightning strikes, and does it ever make
you stop and wonder, if all your good times pass you by,” is one of the
most powerfully lyrics in this song.
Yes, there are going to be storms in your life, but that doesn’t mean
that you have to fear the rain.
6. Emerson Hart-“If You’re Gonna Leave”(2007)
As lead singer and songwriter of the band Tonic,
Emerson Hart penned several pop hits of the nineties, which included, "Open
Up Your Eyes," "If You Could Only See," "You
Wanted More,” and “Take Me As I Am.” He decided to take a break from the band and in 2007 he recorded
his first solo record, “Cigarettes and Gasoline,” from which this song is
taken. It addresses the back and forth
of the breaking up process and how it can be so frustrating to the point where
you just want it over. It is heartfelt
and painful and captures the emotional roller coaster of the relationship in
each guitar riff. This is pop music at
it’s best.
CD Review: Cigarettesand Gasoline
7. Melanie C – “Already Gone”(2007)
This is a fan made video, which takes a lot of its
footage from Madonna’s “Ray Of Light” video, as well as excerpts
from a few BBC Channel shows that interviewed the former Spice Girl. This song is currently only available as a
B-Side import of Melanie’s cover of Bow Wow Wow’s, “I Want
Candy,” but I think it is a much more powerful tune. It reminds me of the 38 Special song
that states, “Hold on Loosely, but don’t let go, if you cling to tightly,
your gonna lose control.” Sometimes we can be so scared to lose a
relationship that in the process of worrying about it, it becomes lost. All good things must come to an end, but in
the meantime, choose to have the best times that you possibly can. I’m not trying to sound jaded, but maybe the
end of the relationship is when both of you pass into the next life. Time is relative to your situation.
Bonus Videos (used in the making of Melanie C’s fan
based video “Already Gone”:
Madonna – “Ray of Light”(2006)
Melanie C appears on the Channel 4 show promoting
new single, 'I Want Candy' for the film of the same name.
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