The Seven Song Itch - Leaving Relationships Behind

Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing.  Sometimes I feel more at ease staying in a difficult situation than take the risk of attempting something greater.  If I know what the problems are in a current situation, then the familiar remedies are close at hand.  When those moments of difficulty outweigh leaping into the unknown then that is when real change has to happen.  Sometimes you can’t help the person that you love, because they don’t want the help—they have to want to become better.  Some may think that this is abandonment, and that you have to have loyalty to the ones you love, but you serve them no purpose if you crash and burn with them.  As of this week, I’m starting a new chapter in my life.  I am embarking upon a new path, and am unsure of where it will take me.  I have to believe in the wisdom of those who have traveled this road, because the path is marked with their successes.  There are a lot of relationships that I’m leaving behind, but I hope to find that several people will be joining me in their pursuits of something great.  There is always room to have travel companions in this life.  I’ve compiled a list of songs that deal with leaving relationships behind.  I’m not advocating bailing at the first sight of trouble, but you have to know when to stay and when to leave.  Some of these songs have a bit of regret in their lyrics, but I believe there is wisdom in these songs.  Reminiscing about things that you could have done, or should have noticed, is a learning experience and is meant to provide comfort to those who are going though the same thing.  Don’t live your life with regret.

Playlist for LeavingRelationships Behind

1. Paul Simon – “Train In The Distance”(1983)

This song, taken from his sixth studio album, “Hearts And Bones” provides a glimmer of hope in a difficult relationship.  I don’t think that the couple in this song ever gets back together, but they remain in contact.  It’s so easy for true believers in love to be tripped up in what their hearts and heads are telling them about the relationship.  This record was intended to be a reunion for Simon & Garfunkel, but due to artistic differences it was reworked as a solo record for Paul.  This album, at the time, was considered one of the low points in Paul’s career, but with the passing of time it has become one of his most important records.

2. SheDaisy-“Little Good-Byes”(1999)

This is the first single off of the group’s debut release, “The Whole SHeBANG.”  I love the playful nature of the lyrics as the women in the song leaves behind little reminders to the man that the relationship is over.  Though the record is not a concept album, it does have running theme of how a women define themselves in a relationships.  The vocal harmonies on this record are top-notch and transcend the borders of the country charts by appearing pop music ones as well.

3. Jimmy Wayne – “Stay Gone”(2003)

This is the lead single off of Jimmy’s self-titled debut release.  It was also re-released on his second album “Do You Believe Me Now,”(2008) to give potential fans a second chance to be properly introduced to this multi-faceted artist.  In this song, the narrator is telling an ex-lover, though you could apply this theme to many relationships, to ‘stay gone’ because they have found peace in their absence, and would like to keep it that way.  Sometimes a person can be so toxic to you that no amount of antidote can save you.  You may still love these people, and they may not be bad for others, but you have to learn to take care of yourself.  With Jimmy, he was fortunate to have been taken in by a very caring Christian couple that saved him from being another casualty of the foster care system.  On January 1, 2010, Jimmy set out on a 1,660 mile solo-hike from Nashville, Tennessee to Phoenix, Arizona to raise awareness about homeless youth and more specifically children aging out of the foster system. Called the "Meet Me Halfway" campaign, he walked 25 miles a day, only coming off the walk for scheduled concerts and to go to the California State Capitol to speak in favor of a bill that would increase the age kids age of the foster system from 18 to 21.  Jimmy is now busier than ever, as he continues to be an advocate for homeless youth in the midst of writing a book and recording new music.

Previous Artist Feature: JimmyWayne

CD Reviews: SaraSmile (2010) & DoYou Believe Me Now? (2008)

4. Keith Urban-“You’ll Think of Me”(2004)

This is the fourth single from his album “Golden Road,” which earned Keith his first Grammy, but he was earning many awards back in Australia before this song.  Keith took a chance and moved to Nashville, because he wanted to move beyond hometown accolades and into the mainstream.  The transition was not easy and was plagued with several stumbling blocks, one of which was checking into rehab right before he was about attain his goal of becoming a country superstar.  The fans waited, and with the support of his wife Nicole Kidman, he was able achieve great success with his career.  Ironically, the theme of this song doesn’t have a happy ending, well…at least for one of the individuals.  This is an all too familiar story, but one that has a punch line.  Sure, you can leave this relationship, but in the process I will become a whole lot better, and all you will have of me is just memories.

5. Sheryl Crow – “Good Is Good”(2005)

This is the first single from her album, “Wildflower,” and though it didn’t garner much attention on the pop charts, I think it’s one of her most profound songs.  Sometimes we can be a little gun-shy about a relationship—we all have baggage, but there comes a time when you have to make some sort of movement forward.  “And every time you hear the rolling thunder, you turn around before the lightning strikes, and does it ever make you stop and wonder, if all your good times pass you by,” is one of the most powerfully lyrics in this song.  Yes, there are going to be storms in your life, but that doesn’t mean that you have to fear the rain.

6. Emerson Hart-“If You’re Gonna Leave”(2007)

As lead singer and songwriter of the band Tonic, Emerson Hart penned several pop hits of the nineties, which included, "Open Up Your Eyes," "If You Could Only See," "You Wanted More,” and “Take Me As I Am.”  He decided to take a break from the band and in 2007 he recorded his first solo record, “Cigarettes and Gasoline,” from which this song is taken.  It addresses the back and forth of the breaking up process and how it can be so frustrating to the point where you just want it over.  It is heartfelt and painful and captures the emotional roller coaster of the relationship in each guitar riff.  This is pop music at it’s best. 

CD Review: Cigarettesand Gasoline

7. Melanie C – “Already Gone”(2007)

This is a fan made video, which takes a lot of its footage from Madonna’s “Ray Of Light” video, as well as excerpts from a few BBC Channel shows that interviewed the former Spice Girl.   This song is currently only available as a B-Side import of Melanie’s cover of Bow Wow Wow’s, “I Want Candy,” but I think it is a much more powerful tune.  It reminds me of the 38 Special song that states, “Hold on Loosely, but don’t let go, if you cling to tightly, your gonna lose control.” Sometimes we can be so scared to lose a relationship that in the process of worrying about it, it becomes lost.  All good things must come to an end, but in the meantime, choose to have the best times that you possibly can.  I’m not trying to sound jaded, but maybe the end of the relationship is when both of you pass into the next life.  Time is relative to your situation.

Bonus Videos (used in the making of Melanie C’s fan based video “Already Gone”:

Madonna – “Ray of Light”(2006)

Melanie C appears on the Channel 4 show promoting new single, 'I Want Candy' for the film of the same name.

Melanie C Orange playlist part 1

The Seven Song Itch - What Is Love?

A friend of mine, currently residing in Germany, posted a photo on Facebook with the following quote, “Love is not a habit, a commitment, or a debt.  Love is not what we hear in romantic songs or see in movies.  Love simply is.”  I completely agree with the sentiment, and look for a kind of love that is described in I Corinthians 13 of the Bible, but you know I’m going to make a song list anyway.  These songs hold special memories to me and stand the test of time.

Playlist for What Is Love?

1. Howard Jones – “What Is Love”(1983)

This was the second single off of his debut album, "Human's Lib." I like the conversational aspect of this song, as it addresses doubts that we all have in a romantic relationship.  If something is bothering you, don't let it simmer till you both blow your top.  There is always time, in any relationship, to reach out and communicate with each other.  Maybe even the doubts about your union can bring you closer together - stranger things have happened.  Don’t let a misunderstanding end something before it begins.

2 Peter Cetera – “Glory of Love”(1986)

A long time ago, I took a very lovely girl to a screening of "The Karate Kid Part II," and this was the love theme from that movie.  It was my first semi-public make-out session, resulting in me getting popcorn and bubblegum in my hair.  The surprising thing, however, was that this gal had seen the movie the day before so that when her father quizzed her about the plot she would be able to give a excellent answer.  You gotta love those smart girls.  I still haven't seen the movie all the way through, I guess I should do something about that.

3. Amy Grant – “Saved by Love”(1988)

If you ask me what my favorite song of all time is, it would be this one.  Back in 1988, I checked Amy's “Lead Me On” album out of the church library per a pretty gal's recommendation.  My love of her music is the only thing that has lasted from those days of old.  I began to collect her back catalog and continue to do so to this day.  I like the themes that drift into her music and find both her sacred and secular work to be transcendental.  She just seems to know how to spin a story, even if it's a pop diddy.  Laura, the woman mentioned in the song, is a semi-autobiographical nod to her sister Carol. This is my hope for those who are not in the spotlight of life, but give it their all.  A windfall of love is in store for them, even if they don’t know it.

4. Vanessa Williams and Brian McNight – “Love Is”(1993)

One of my secret obsessions in the early nineties was “Beverly Hills 90210,” and this was the love ballad from that TV Series.  Though the song never appeared in the show, it did appear in the spinoff "Melrose Place."  The paring of these two vocalists is just magical, and it brings a bit of nostalgia to these old ears.

5. SheDaisy – “In Terms of Love”(2006)

This is a heartbreaking catharsis about believing in life after love.  Kristyn (Supporting Vocals and Principal songwriter) is brilliant in the lyrics and really conveys that moving on is not easy.  Consideration of what comes too soon and what comes too late in a relationship almost seems commonplace in coupledom, but you have to love yourself enough to know when to stay in and when to get out..

6. Taylor Swift – “Love Story”(2008)

Ah, this song speaks to the hopeless romantic in me.  Yeah I know, Taylor changes the end of the classic tale of “Romeo and Juliet” by Shakespeare, but I’d like to believe that those crazy kids found a way to make love last.  This song is hopeful, heartfelt, and helpful in getting two star-crossed lovers together.  It still gives me goose bumps, and yes I know, it’s just a pop country song, but sometimes we need a fairy-tales to take us away to a far off land where love has a chance. <3 <3 <3

7. Michael Bublé – “Crazy Love”(2009)

This Van Morrison song has been covered dozens of times, and I like them all, but Michael’s version of the song really speaks to me.  He is a modern day balladeer that really knows how to croon.  So much of the music today is launched at you with high intensity, so when a chilled out love ballad comes my way, I want to savor it.

Bonus Videos:

To quote a Righteous Brothers song (Rock and Roll Heaven), “If you believe in forever, then life is just a one-night-stand.  If there’s a rock n roll heaven, well you know they got a hellva band.”  With the passing of Donna Summer and Robin Gibb, I can’t help but wonder who else will leave this mortal coil and join that illustrious group in the afterlife?  I am sad for the loss of these two great vocalists, but thankful for the legacy of songs that they leave behind.  Here are two songs of Love from their catalog.

Donna Summer “Love to Love You Baby”(1975)

Many years ago, when Ms. Summer became a born again Christian, she stopped performing this song live, and I respect her decision to do so.  It has that sensual passion of lovemaking that others have tried to duplicate, but end up delving into depravity – not that there is anything wrong with that.  This song is “Hot Stuff,” but I think we sometimes miss the point of intimacy.  I was taught that sex is dirty, but save it for someone you love – a contradiction of sorts.  I’m not advocating free love, but I do think that people should relax and enjoy the ride.  No disrespect is intended by including this song in this playlist..

The Bee Gees – “How Deep Is Your Love”(1977)

This is another tune that poses the question of how committed you are to a person and waxes poetic about the depths of one’s feelings.  Sometimes love can be one sided, but that can’t be helped.  It’s rare to find someone on the same level of intimacy, but when you find them, hold on for dear life.  The greatest gift you can give a person is yourself.

The Seven Song Itch - Soul Searching Songs

In the midst of trying to accomplish something in life, I wonder if all of the effort I’m going though is worth the outcome?  Should I give up on the long-term objective and settle for the short-term goal?  Settling into something is not the same as settling down.  The latter implies that all of the peaks have been passed and you are on the windward side of the mountain.  But what really is settling down?  Is it giving up on goals, hopes, or dreams?  My go to band in the midst of melancholy is SheDaisy.  I know this sounds odd, but hear me out.  I was listening to one of their songs ("5 4 3 2 Run") the other night and a lyric struck me, “There’s more to life than just takin’ up space.”  Wikipedia defines Introspection as “the self-observation and reporting of conscious inner thoughts, desires and sensations. It is a conscious and purposive process relying on thinking, reasoning, and examining one's own thoughts, feelings, and, in more spiritual cases, one's soul.”  This song has always given me perspective in that life doesn’t always have to be heavy, and there are moments when it should be fun.  But can I relate to other introspective songs, even though they may be heavy, and find some sort of resolve in my life without going all emo?  The answer is yes, because I get perspective from the music in my life. Listening to the same selection of songs, or genre, for me, seems limiting because I can learn from the diverse musical landscape.  I find connections in music and discover that I’m not as different as somebody else and maybe their situation can give me perspective.  Searching your soul is a good thing, but remember that you have a physical presence as well, and it’s about time to go out there and feel the warmth of each other, just not in a perverted way, unless you have permission of the other party or parties.

Playlist of Soul SearchingSongs

1. Natalie Merchant-“Carnival”(1995)

When I moved to Chicago, this was the song that carried me from academic meandering to city dwelling.  It took me several years to discover this song's importance to my life.  At first, I thought it was transition from an acrimonious existence to chaotic indifference.  It now feels like the need for exploration, for it's own sake, has a cost that takes away the innocence of discovery and puts the burden of being self aware upon your psyche.  I've seen two many friends destroyed by their own revelations and wish for amnesic resolve.  A gift I sometimes wish I could afford.

2. Dixie Chicks–“Wide Open Spaces”(1998)

Taking that first step out into the wilderness can be very daunting, but it’s a move that you should make.  Life keeps moving forward, even though we may want the world to stop so that we can catch our breath.  Though daunting, new experiences can be exhilarating and you can discover new things about yourself.  I’m not saying that we learn these life lessons because I see situations repeat themselves.

3. Stacie Orrico – “(There's Gotta Be) More to Life”(2003)

In the midst of attaining some sort of success in my life, this song really struck me.  I had corporate job and was financially successful, and yet I still felt empty inside.  I stockpiled material things in the hopes of Keeping up with the Joneses.  When it all crashed down around me, it was those material things that became a burden and the maintenance cost was more than I could bear.  I began to wonder, is this all that there is in life?  This song made me seek out the answers.  I don’t have them yet, but I feel like I’m upon the path to finding happiness.

4. Chantal Kreviazuk-“Invincible”(2009)

It’s really easy to get turned around in this life, but what makes things bearable is to have a partner in crime.  Sometimes you just have to laugh at the insanity that comes your way, and it’s better when you have a kindred spirit along for the ride.  Taking solace in someone is sometimes the only solution to an insolvable situation.  Perspective and a good sense of humor heals a suffering soul.

5. Our Lady Peace-“Innocent”(2002)

Oh how we ponder our problems, and everyone has them regardless of status or situation.  What we have to realize is that difficulties happen to you, not because of you.  I don’t know how many times that I’ve focused on my life as a failure, instead of the failures in my life, because when I view it in this light, I also have to factor in the successes I’ve had as well.  Life is just a ride and there will be high and low points, but you have to remember that not everything is meant to drag you down.  “One day, you’ll stand up on your own,” is a lyric that I think goes to the heart of the matter.

6. Switchfoot-“The Setting Sun” (2005)

If I had to come up with a list of my favorite albums, which would not be easy, a sure selection that would make the list is this band’s “Nothing Is Sound,” record.  The collection of songs, including this one, has a great wide-open sound that just revels in power cords and larger than life lyrics.  I really feel alive when I listen to this song.  It’s a heavier album than their previous releases.

7. Green Day-“Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)”(1997)

For what it’s worth, this song is worth a spin.  Yes, it’s cliché and has been played at more commencement parties than I care to think about, but I think its simple message is profound.  It’s easy to get caught up in the events of the day and we sometimes forget to stop and smell the roses.  I like this band, they seem to get it, and are more punk than I’m willing to acknowledge, but there it is anyway.

The Seven Song Itch - Bruce Hornsby Piano

One night, not too long ago, I was listening to an album track “Without A Sound,” from the group SheDaisy. I marveled at its simplicity and sensed a familiarity in the piano accompaniment. The sound of that song reminded me of “I Can’t Make You Love Me,” by Bonnie Raitt. Though I do not know who played the piano on the SheDaisy song, I can attest that one of my favorite musicians played on the Raitt track—Bruce Hornsby. He has worked with a myriad of artists, which includes: Stevie Nicks, Don Henley, Cowboy Junkies, Bela Fleck, and even the Grateful Dead. Bruce is consistent in his piano work, but brings something new to each composition. Even though he may not be directly credited with a song, here is a list of seven songs that showcase his sound.

1. SheDaisy–“Without A Sound” (2004)

Sometimes you don’t need a full band of musicians to make a song great. Someone once told me that Keith Richards (The Rolling Stones) became a great guitarist because he knows how to “play the pauses.” The simple piano in this song conveys an emotional Niagara Falls of sadness in its quiet melody. It also has a sound like Amy Grant’s “If These Walls Could Speak,” but that’s another set of songs.

2. Bonnie Raitt–“I Can’t Make You Love Me” (1991)

Although Bruce Hornsby provided fills and interpolations on this song, he is not credited for writing it. His piano part on the track has become associated with this Ballad, though he did record his own version later on.

3. Cowboy Junkies–“Rock And Bird” (1990)

This spooky song has haunting lyrics of being caught between the sky and the ground. Bruce gives the foundation to Margo Timmins’s ethereal voice in what I feel is an under appreciated song. This track was on The Caution Horses record, but was overshadowed by the previous successful release, so I don’t believe it was given popper consideration. I still grapple with the song’s meaning, but revel in the vocal and musical dichotomy and find it brilliant.

4. Don Henley–“End Of The Innocence” (1989)

This one Bruce gets a writing credit in a wonderfully introspective composition that appears on Don’s third solo album named for the song. Nostalgia saturates this pensive selection about entering into middle age.  The song is more than a flashback of someone’s recollections; it also has political sub tones that aren’t just banged out on the keyboard.

5. Stevie Nicks & Bruce Hornsby–“Two Kinds Of Love” (1989)

Stevie’s Fleetwood Mac roots can still be heard—stemming from her duets with Lindsey Buckingham.  In her solo work, she had hit duets with Tom Petty (Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around) and Don Henley (Leather and Lace), but in this instance it is Bruce Hornsby.  The song appears on Stevie’s Other Side of the Mirror record, but the single failed to chart.  I think it is another haunting melody with a good collaboration between these two great artists.  It also includes some sax work from Kenny G.

6. Bruce Hornsby & Bela Fleck–“Tangled Up In Blue”

Though Bob Dylan is the author of this one, Bela and Bruce gave their spin on this record. This is around the time that Bruce started to expand from just pop hits into a more improvisational jazz artist. You really can see the evolution in his playing on this classic record.

7. Bruce Hornsby and the Range–“Mandolin Rain” (1986)

This is a classic Hornsby tune. It is, in my opinion, the benchmark of Bruce’s sound. Several years after this song, he broke up the band and started composing and playing more elaborate pieces. He continues to delight listeners by sprinkling his magic on a select few projects.